Church Doors

from by Old State



There's a buzzing in my pocket and it won't leave me be.
I'll hide out in the bathroom to see what they might need.
They said that we had lost you. That you had left us all alone.
They said you'd be gone for good.

Now I'm struggling here to map out my next move.
I ran out from work and tried to meet with you.
We were too late to see your final breaths.

Now I'm stuck in some basement waiting to get to your wake.
The pastor called in your name, yet no one had made a sound. The silence had left us choked.
We gathered at the church it was colder than we had thought.
Lifting up my hand to push full force toward a door that would never be easy to move.
I look down the pews. They're lined with faces I haven't seen in some years.
Most of them forgotten, I know they've forgotten me too.

Jake walked in, heavy eyes on his face. I never thought I'd see him again.
He showed us his shirt he had everyone sign on the last day of school.
There was your name on his sleeve.
The last thing you'd leave.

A few days pass. Your casket is resting. We're waiting to say our goodbyes.
The priest said some kind things and everyone smiles. Then, your friends form a line towards the front.
They tell stories of your highest moments about the times you moved us to tears.

The reception was calming and everyone talking.
It only made us miss you more.

"I pray I never have to write this song again. You are loved."


from Perspectives, released July 23, 2016



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